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Submitted on
February 25
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632 KB
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64 (who?)
like a male wednesday by pryiore like a male wednesday by pryiore
I can't deal with these revamps they're too different oh my god is this the same person.


Just for the record—that's the wrong way to hold a violin orz

  b a s i c

N A M E ● Claude Larkspleen | 新世 瞬
A.K.A. Phantom of the Library ( according to Zoey Blake )
A G E ● 16
G E N D E R ● Male ( I assure you. It's a male. )
H E I G H T ● 170 cm | 5.6 ft
W E I G H T ● 110 lbs | 50 kg
B I R T H D A Y ● November 11th
H O U S E ● Ravenclaw
Y E A R ● 6th
E T H N I C I T Y ● Spanish | Chinese

p e r s o n a l i t y 
✦ intelligent.  ✦ astute.  ✦ calm.  ✦ half-assed.  ✦ apathetic.  ✦ determined.  ✦ stubborn.  ✦ deceptive.  ✦ passionate.  ✦ pretentious.
  • Intelligent in the sense of "I-know-how-to-screw-with-your-head-and-I-like-it". He has a very good memory and is good at remembering things through the use of mnemonics. Of course, he only bothers to retain information that interests him. Intentionally, Claude forgets names - names mean next to nothing in the eyes of Claude - and only recognizes people through sight. If he fails to recognize someone during a second encounter, then he'll need a few hints to get his brain going again. Unless a strong impression is created during the first encounter, your name will be forgotten. Most of the time, he's a complete scatterbrain. You can count on him to forget his wand in dire situations. Heck. He even forgets how old he is sometimes. " Boy, how old are you? " " Er . . . last time I bothered to check . . . 12? "
  • When asked a question, he won't give any more answers than necessary. He can also be evasive, not giving direct answers to questions just to troll people. You have to be very careful about the way you phrase things around him because he will find every loophole available and turn your words around. Liz is an exception to this trolling tendency of his - namely because she is too smart to fall for his traps. Also has no qualms about lying if it suits the situation. If you show any weaknesses around him, he will likely use it against you one day...if he remembers. A bit of a pretentious jerk - often acting as if he is on the higher moral ground.
  • He will calmly bleed to death. Claude can keep a cool head most of the time. Insults, threats, physical damage, etc - don't mind bro. This trait stems from the fact that he's too lazy to get angry. He rarely raises his voice, usually speaking in a tone barely above a whisper. If his surrounding are too loud, he will simply move closer to the person he's speaking to. If you still can't hear him, he'll just keep repeating patiently like a broken record until you can. His calm demeanor may give people the impression of politeness - or pretentiousness. He's also blatant when he deems it acceptable to be so - but he sugarcoats with euphemisms and stuff. "Am I fat?" "Gravity likes you a lot." 
  • Claude has three lists in this world: The list of things he will bother to care about; the list of tasks he will be willing to get off his fat ass for; and the list of ways to screw with people's brains. He loves messing with people's heads - if they're worth messing with in the first place. Typically, he activates his troll mode within the greeting stage and begins gauging your reaction (from there he'll decide if he should keep being a jerk or loosen up). Will do this to most people he meets, and he usually ends up making girls cry - or getting himself a bruise the colors of the Lakers logo.
  • Apathy. Claude's default personality. Rolls along with anything - no matter how strange. He is just so out of touch with reality that he doesn't take real life situations too seriously. Everyone is more or less just a character in a Shakespeare play. You're either a troll victim or an obstacle ( pick one ). His affections rarely dwell on a single person for long and he needs constant contact with his "friends" or else he'll lose interest in them (with the exception of Zoey). SO SAD but too bad ( ⊙ヮ⊙). It takes a while before he grows attached to anyone. Apparently has no problem with antagonizing people.
  • Claude jumps to conclusions quickly and once he sets his plans in motion, there's no stopping. But he sucks at planning and doesn't really think through anything. Also, he is not afraid of taking risks, nor is he afraid of breaking a couple of rules. Rules = obstacles. More danger = better. Most of the time, Zoey has to help him fill up the holes in his crazy plans.
  • The trait that got him into Ravenclaw : Passionate. When Claude's interested in something, he's interested. That Ravenclaw blood PTERODACTYL SCREECHES for answers and he'll pitch in everything he's got - or can get ahold of - to reveal a gripping mystery. One would find it very difficult to get him out of his "plaannnns" once he starts.
l i k e s _ d i s l i k e s 
 + rain
 + spicy food
 + tea (Earl Grey)
 + magical creatures (namely Hippogriffs)
 + soccer "FOOTBALL"-- o-<--<
 - crowds and loud noises
 - crying / weeping girls (fear factor)
 - insects (unless they're potion ingredients) and cats
 - bright colors
 - when people listen to their hearts-- "Listen to your brain people. Your heart don't do grindylows but pump blood-- ._."

  b a c k g r o u n d 

h i s t o r y —
  • LO AND BEHOLD - the most "INTERESTING" biography ever to exist in Illegal Bus. Claude was raised in a middle-classed family located in Spain, Muggle style - which was a fairly uneventful life ( SURPRISE SURPRISE ). His mother, Wei-Lai, was a witch as well as an oriental wand crafter - her wands looked "funny" compared to most Western wands. Despite being the biggest underachiever to ever exist on the planet, she expected GREAT things from Claude and often has to hit him with chanclas when he was...being himself. Because herbs and potions are a Shun specialty, Wei-Lai constantly trained him in the art of advanced potion brewing. All this Spartan-esque training has made Claude some kind of avant-garde potions prodigy (meaning he's good @ it, but prefers to blow stuff up). To the relief of Claude, she has severe wanderlust and never stays home for more than an hour.
  • His Muggle father, Cayo, - on the other hand - only expected Claude to get a job. Needless to say, Claude preferred the company of his father. This was not to say that Cayo was a bad parent. He taught Claude a lot of philosophy, psychology, and literature. Instead of developing into the wise and considerate man his father was, Claude turned into a cheeky smart-ass. He used the philosophy he learned to troll people, the psychology to mindscrew people, and the literature annoy people. Fortunately for mankind, Claude liked to be a loner bookworm and most children in his Muggle school had the sense to avoid him.
  • Like all the other humans around the globe, Claude has experienced bullying. HOWEVER, bullies found it rather difficult to get a kick out of him - unsentimental reactions, no resistance - it was like bullying a tree. Still, he served as his elementary school's punching bag - a past experience that has made him nice and firm like a 110-pound, cold turkey. After 11 years of this junk, Claude finally got a letter from Hogwarts and waved ta-ta to his Muggle life. His mother, squealing with happiness, crafted him a wand as a parting gift and responsibly dropped him off at the Hogwarts express before running off for some mahjong.
s c h o o l —
  • YEAR I - IV ✦ Nice kid. Much more happy to make friends at Hogwarts. Noob powers at their finest.
  • YEAR V ✦ Polite and passive. MAGICAL CREATURES ♥ ♥ ♥. Puberty kicked in. Made plenty of friends / harem buds. Sad end-of-the-school-year. "Mom. I think our school has gone crazy." "JUST FOCUS ON YO POTIONS GRADE, LOSER."
  • YEAR VI ✦ Takes trolling up to eleven. Egg gone bad. Gate of friendship has closed for the most part. Obsession with world domination has toned down a little.
f a m i l y —
✦  M O T H E R [pureblood] ● Wei-Lai Shun >> Wand Crafter : : Tiger Mom : : 38
The KUNG-FU fighting, ramen brewing, wand-crafting, cheongsam wearing, Chinese speaking momma who ships his ass off to summer school when he comes home with a "Troll" on potions. She's never really home because YOLO LIFE. She may not look it, but she's also very knowledgeable in Eastern magic and herbs. Constantly dotes on Claude when he's home ( by doting, I mean threateningly chasing after him with bamboo sticks ). Buys all his school robes in the Walmart Halloween section - explains why he never wears it-- IT'S STILL GOT THE MANUFACTURING TAG OTL--
✦  F A T H E R [muggle] ● Cayo Larkspleen >> Librarian : : Low Expectations Spanish Father : : 46
The philosophical thinking, Spanish teaching, soccer kicking, book shelving papa who seems like a total pushover but can kick ass harder than Hercules. Fortunately, he prefers to kicks soccer over ass.

  s c h o o l

m a g i c 
s p e l l s
        -  avis  :  :  Conjures a flock of birds ( ravens in Claude’s case ).
        -  oppungno (point)  :  :  Directs objects or individuals to attack a certain target ( Claude pairs this with Avis ).
        -  accio  :  :  Summons objects ( he mostly uses this to get books without getting up ).
        -  expulso  :  :  Blows things up ( blowing things up is fun okay ).
        -  episkey  :  :  Heals minor injuries ( useful, since he has the tendency to blow up half of his face in potions class ).
        -  silencio  :  :  Silences the victim ( when chatty people start to annoy him ).
w a n d
        -  C O R E ● Phoenix Feather
        -  L E N G T H ● 10 ¼ inches
        -  W O O D ● Ebony
        -  F L E X ● Supple
( His mom carved a bunch of random Chinese words onto his wand because she's expecting dem Europeans to THINK the words are meaningful when lol ).

c l a s s e s 
e l e c t i v e s
        - Alchemy ( FMA FTW ).
        - Care of Magical Creatures ( Favorite class - any mention of "Magical" and "Creatures" in the same sentence will be equivalent to setting off a very happy bomb ).
e x t r a
        - Muggle Music ( Rusty violin skills. A mandrake's screeching would be more preferable ).
        - Ghoul Studies ( Paranormal activity FTW ).

  m i s c.

m i s c e l l a n e o u s 
  • Hates all forms of physical activity. He has low stamina. Surprisingly, he has strong arms because he often helped his father carry loads of books in the library. 
  • He never takes out his textbooks in class because he has them memorized.
  • Spanish accent thickens when he's nervous or lying. If it's really serious, he'll just lapse into Spanish completely. ( Spanish accents sound a lot like Russian accents ). Knows a bit of French because Spanish and French are similar.
  • Contrary to popular belief, he does have a life. Yes, he knows Google Chrome and Pewdiepie.
  • Has absolutely no sense of personal space. He'll be all up in your face breathing your CO2.
  • Showers with his clothes on. All those other people who shower naked are pure weirdos.
  • 5 minutes in the sun and his skin gets owned.
  • You know that one kid in class whose hands always feel like they've been stuck in a freezer for 6 hours when everybody else is hot and sweaty? Yeah. Das Claude.
  • Bad eyesight. Left = almost blind. Right = perfect 20. Incomprehensibly, he covers his right eye cause pryiore was too lazy to draw both eyes.
  • #HIPPOGRIFF AND SHAKESPEARE DEVOTION TOO STRONGK ( some people may not know this, but his love of Hippogriffs originally stemmed from his curiosity of how they tasted like nomnomnom ).
  • Reads on a windowsill. Feel free to kick him off. :iconfealsplz:
  • Acts all polite and dainty with his food in front of people and when they turn around BOOM-- //shoves it all into his mouth
  • Hippogriff repellent. They part before him like the red sea before Moses--
  • HATES going to the hospital wing. As long as he hasn't lost any limbs, he'll try to cure himself instead of going. This stems from his dislike of gore and the smell of rubbing alcohol.
  • He only shakes hands with people he considers friends. And he's very serious about it too. Do not offer to shake his hand if you've just met him or he'll stare at it until you withdraw.
  • Bothers to get good grades in Herbology to pursue his dream career of being a Magizoologist. If that career fails, he'll become a dragon-importing crime boss.
  • Has a fascination with taking down the ministry.

r e l a t i o n   h a r e m 

//wants to meet everybody's kids
//slow ass replier with the memory capacity of 1 kilobyte

✦ - brohomo - friendly, does not necessarily mean friend
✧ - no homo - means definite troll victim

[ accomplice in crimes / senpai notice him plz ] Zoey Blake ✦ Also known as the girl who is an exception to all his horrible behavior. Earned his respect without batting an eyelash. He appreciates her intelligence and strong virtues - funny considering his lack of virtues. The only person he considers a real friend so far. Kinda bummed they didn't go through with the unbreakable vow of friendship-4-lyfe...although his crazy antics might end up killing the both of them. They shall become crime bosses together. Illegally importing dragons. Annihilating the ministry. Fun times ( o v o )b. She gave him a friendship bracelet and he was like: :iconwatfaceplz: is this? A symbol of our eternal allegiance? Can't we just UV? And a remembrall. She got him a remembrall but he keeps forgetting to bring it with hi--

[ complicated love interest / noncanon wife ] Macey Phillips ✦ They share a relationship pure Shakespearean in its dramatic potential. Borderline on-and-off. She has a tendency to run off and seek comfort in other dudes whenever their relationship hits a wall. Imagine every Korean drama and shoujo anime there ever was...mashed into one big psychological thriller and you've got a pretty general idea of their "romance".

[ object of worship ] Mei-Lin the Satan Queen 
✧ Currently beating around her berserk button. One day, she shall trample him into the earth face-first. //Masochistic tendencies activate.

[ distant friend ] Marie Soffian (Sorafin) 
✧ WOOT. The red-eyed book bud that every troll needs. May or may not have made her cry/forgotten her name.

[ sexy manbeater QUACK ] Daughter of the Queen of England Amy Deaslolwat (???) ✦ First she sends him flying. Then she tosses him into the Hippogriff pen and drags him around like a sack of potatoes. Pretty girls are dangerous ._. but hilarious. He finds her very entertaining. They have a medieval knight (Sir Claude of the Southern Peninsula) and English nobility thing going on and it is epicapicapic.

[ crazy girl who scares him a little ] Natsuki (Lilia) 
✧ Can't pronounce her name so he calls her "Lilia". Perfect subject for his psychological experiments - mild-mannered and frail ( like a lab rabbit ). Also made her cry. Consecutively. Four times. She harbors the mistaken impression that he is an oh so wonderful person and he finds himself playing into that impression. Which one is the one doing the manipulating here, Claude has no idea.

[ forever pending potions girl ] Gina 
✧ She actually asked him for help in potions - of all subjects. Prepare yourselves for an explosion.
[ awkward acquaintance ] Amelie (Evelyn) 
✧ Appears to have forgotten her name as well. "Evelyn" will work just fine. She's getting real sick of your shizz, Claude. Kai : Hips by FallThruStardust

[ untroll-able adventure bro ] Elizabeth McGuire (Liz) ✦ Oh ho ho ho. She's a good one. NEVER, in his life, has he EVER met someone so equally astute. Can't seem to get a good grip around her brain so he's just gonna let her run the show ;m; Can't win dis. Given that he's unwilling to form easy friendship bonds, it'll take some time before he completely removes her from his troll list.

[ muscleman \ bring it on ] Alex Ang ( Alexander the Great ) 
 (  ಠ v ಠ )・゚✧  She must bench lift trucks or something. Overall a very carefree and roll-with-it girl, which makes her an easy person to get along with-- since most of his rude remarks just whizz by past her head. Not sure how much he can push before he antagonizes her though.

c a l l
   m e 
        ☑ n o t e s
        ☑ s k y p e ( note me for it plz ; v ; )

( ಥ⌣ಥ) You know you want to be in the harem //shot
Add a Comment:
Nikae Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2014  Student General Artist
lol another Claude revamp! :iconsocute-plz:
asdfghjkl I keep saying I'm gonna revamp Zoey's app art... but I never do ;;u;;
pryiore Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2014
//tick tock plays in the distance
Don't stop makin' art~
Revamps blowin' up my fart~
Jaylin-Raven-100 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I love this guy's parents XDDD
pryiore Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2014
Parenting 101
This guy's parents edition
Dad: Honey. The baby is hungry.
Mom: There's a pack of ramen in the garage.
Dad: //accidentally drops kid as he stands up//
Dad: Scream 
Jaylin-Raven-100 Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
beautiful XD

Kaistellations Featured By Owner Oct 19, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Everytime I come back to look at his app

His re-vamp




pryiore Featured By Owner Oct 19, 2014
The process of evolution:
From ape to human-esque creature.

And I see you've changed up your coloring as well~
Kaistellations Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist

More like gone back to the dark ages :iconsopsplz:
lautte Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2014
intense screaming instant noodles omfg
pryiore Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2014
Ye liek em instant noodles? Eh? Eh? //winkwonks @ Alexander the Great
Add a Comment: